WTF: Former WU LYF members form new yacht rock band, call it “Los Porcos” (?)

by on April 27, 2013

Posted in: Eclectic, Music, News, Rock

images

Yet another weird development for a band with one of the least predictable stories out there: three former members of the now-dissolved, tragically short-lived British rock band/cult/gang of hooligans/peddlers of transcendental experience WU LYF (standing for “World United Lucifer Youth Foundation”) have regrouped and formed Los Porcos, a self-described yacht rock band whose terrible name is perfectly matched by their hideous choice of album artwork (see above). Two nights ago they performed their first live show in London, and their SoundCloud already has two mp3s on it. Thanks to Pitchfork for this this information. Moving on:

The three former World United Lucifer Youths involved are drummer Joe Manning, Tom McClung, and guitarist Evans Kati. WU LYF fans may notice that this leaves only one member of the earlier group out, the frontman with the voice of a feral monster wrestling a helicopter, one Mr. Ellery Roberts. The new music from Los Porcos misses his amazing vocals and also the natural cavernous reverb of the church where WU LYF’s only, wonderful LP Go Tell Fire To The Mountain was recorded, but Manning, McClung, and Kati have proven extremely talented in the past so I vote we give them a chance. Anyway, if you’ve missed the unaired Gossip Girl episode that was the WU LYF breakup, here’s a quick recap:

1) Roberts and the rest of the band experienced intra-WU LYF tension during the Year of Our Lord 2012. The cause? That’s one secret I’ll never tell. XOXO! (Alternate sign-off: Y-O-K-O?)

2) Roberts, instead of discussing the TOP SECRET issues with his bandmates, displayed a general lack of diplomatic skill, emotional intelligence, professional responsibility, and typographical awareness by posting a YouTube video of an unreleased song by the band, “T R I U M P H,” in the information box of which he announced the quartet’s professional breakup with the words, “WU LYF is dead to me.” (Not even a “We Bros” joke? WU LYF really must be dead to the guy.) The song, by the way, was pretty great, but it’s been taken off YouTube since — come for the music, stay for the drama. Given that WU LYF, to this point, were known for being masters of anonymity and surprise, the statement took longer to sink in than probably intended.

3) In last week’s NME — the infamous British gossip rag that, occasionally, also concerns itself with the dirty work of overpraising pop music acts — Manning revealed that Roberts had neither received the band’s permission to post the song nor warned them that he was ending their careers as they knew them in the public arena, and that Manning, McClung, and Kati had learned of the end of WU LYF via social media and music blogs. Awkward! Presumably he waited so long to bring this to our attention because anyone who has seen Blair Waldorf in action knows that it is always — I repeat, always — best, when you get into a major disagreement in public, to remain silent on its cause or effects, in order to escalate the tension. Then, let everyone forget it ever happened, EXCEPT YOU, YOU WILL ALWAYS REMEMBER, YOU WILL ALWAYS NURSE THIS PAIN, ALWAYS AND FOREVER, FLAMES, FLAMES ON THE SIDE OF YOUR FACE, BURNING, BURNING. Next, drag the whole mess back into the light of day at a moment when it is personally advantageous for you, such as when you have a new yacht rock band with a stupid name that you need to publicize so people actually turn up to your big live debut in London and you don’t look like total losers amirite?? Finally, leave the hordes slavering for more by refusing to comment on the matter further just when the episode was getting good! The reason? “It’s too personal.” Not for us, Joe. Nothing is too personal for us. Your lives are our entertainment. Go tell fire to the mountain, the fire here being secretssssss and the mountain here being the press. Plz Joe. Los Porcos 4ever.

No word yet from Ellery Roberts, who has presumably rejoined the wolf pack in which he was raised before killing his brother Remus, founding Rome, and starting WU LYF. Or, perhaps, he’s been sent to boarding school in Connecticut after turning to cocaine for answers instead of his friends who were right there all along and just wanted the best for him and their careers which depended on him but it’s no big deal I promise everything is fine we’re totally cool lol! BUT rumor has it he was recently seen in Victoria Station. Is Ellery Roberts back in London? Will he attend a Los Porcos concert? Stay tuned….

PS. This one time, WU LYF got a cold call from Michel Gondry and hung up. Another time, they made an A&R rep pay 50 pounds for a single demo track. What I’m saying is, none of this should surprise anyone.

PPS. 50 pounds…OF FLESH!!!! Haha I’m just kidding. No I’m not. Yes I am.