Try to Make Me Go to Rehab…
by WS Student on August 13, 2007
Posted in: Uncategorized
Just in case you missed the real news–with all this hype about some Karl Rove guy resigning clogging up your news–Amy Winehouse decided she doesn’t need rehab and is going to be fine. Personally, I think this is a good decision. Last week’s experience that landed her in a hospital overnight was just bad luck. If people went to rehab everytime they took a cocktail of heroin, ecstasy, cocaine and ketamine, our rehabilitation centers would be overflowing and we’d be bored out of our minds at work with no celebrity stories to read. And the way they use ‘cocktail’ as if it’s a bad thing; I mean, isn’t it better to mix a little bit of everything than to do a whole lot of one thing? And who knew ketamine was that bad? It’s only a horse tranquilizer.
Said Winehouse about the hospital ordeal: “When I get self-destructive I just need to spend time with Dad. Rehab is a cop-out.” Luckily, her father Mitch is a former cab driver and from what I remember from Trainspotting, London cabdrivers are great at getting overdosing people to hospitals right away. Cheers Ms. Winehouse, I hope you clean up well. And if not, come party in Middlebury sometime. I can get some killer ketamine from Morgan’s Horse Farm right down the road.